P is for Polyphemus
The Cycloptic shepherd son of Poseidon lived upon the island of Sicily - where, bringing in his herd of sheep one fine day, he happened upon Odysseus and company goofing off in his cave. Polyphemus trapped the Greeks in the cave and began to snack upon them as if they were delicious Feta-flavored jerked beef. Ah, but clever Odysseus got the giant Cyclops totally wasted on wine, stabbed him in the eye, and escaped the cave clinging to the underside of Polyphemus's sheep.
To this day you can still hear the Cyclops bellowing curses at Odysseus - for he will never again be able to look at his stack of "BUSTY ONE-EYES" magazines.